Karen's Shoplifting Trip
by Aelysa
Summary: First in a series of little sister parodies. Karen wants overpriced merchandise from Club G but her parents both say no. Karen begins to turn to alternative methods to obtain what she wants but her efforts will not be without consequences. Completed!
1. Club G

**Chapter 1**

**Club G**

"Hey girls! What do you know? If you have style you have to let it show. Come on now and dance with me: I will see you all when you get to Club G." I sang along with the television commercial for the most gigundoly wonderful place in the world Club G at the top of my lungs.

"Karen, I do not like that song. I do not like it at all," whined my little brother Andrew. He is sometimes a big pest. Well make that he is a pest all of the time.

"Andrew," I said impatiently, "Club G is really cool. Here I will show you latest catalog for Club G clothing and accessories." I shoved the catalog in Andrew's face so he would be sure not to miss it. Boys can be so stupid sometimes.

Andrew scowled at me, "I do not want your silly catalog. Leave me alone Karen or I will tell Mommy!"

I guess I should introduce myself. I am Karen Brewer. I do not have a middle name. I am seven years old and in the second grade. I should be in the first grade but I skipped a grade because I am gigundoly smart. Andrew is my little brother. He is four years old. Sometimes he goes to preschool but mostly he lounges around the house and whines. I have blonde hair and blue eyes. Andrew looks a lot like me except I have glasses. I have two pairs of glasses. Well I have two of everything in the world but the glasses are different. I'll get back to the two of everything in the world part later. I have a pair of pink glasses for reading and blue glasses for everyday use.

It was a little house Friday afternoon. Andrew and I were in the living room watching television. Our favorite show 'Katie Kitty' was on but it was time for a commercial break. My favorite commercial for my favorite place was on. Club G is a place which sends catalogs with toys, clothes, furniture, make-up, hair stuff and accessories for girls my age in the mail. There are even real Club G stores. There is one in New York City. That is the closest one to Stoneybrook, Connecticut where Andrew and I live. Mommy refuses to take me to Club G. She says it is too far away to drive for a store. Boo and bullfrogs! That is what I say whenever I am mad or sad. Mommy just rolls her eyes at me.

The Club G catalog comes in the mail once every month. All my friends get the Club G catalog too. So far no one has been able to convince their parents to let them order anything from Club G. Except for Pamela Harding who has come to school in a Club G sweatshirt and hat before. But Pamela does not count because she is my enemy. Only my friends count and none of them have anything from Club G yet. We are gigundoly jelly of Pamela Harding. We say "jelly" instead of jealous because it makes us sound cool like my big sister Kristy and her friends. Kristy does not say "jelly" but she says things like "dibble" and "chilly". I do not say those words because I had to be original and come up with my own word. I bet Kristy would be jelly of me because she did not come up with it first.

In case you were wondering, the "G" in Club G stands for G. That means girls only and no boys allowed. I do not like boys. Except for maybe Ricky who I married on the playground and the boys in my family I do not like boys very much. Boys are so icky and stinky. Andrew is my brother but he is no exception to this rule.

"Andrew, just look at what all you can buy from Club G." I opened the catalog and flashed it in front of his face.

Andrew hit the catalog away, "I said I do not care Karen so leave me alone."

"No Andrew," I snapped at him, "I will not leave you alone until you say Club G is the coolest thing in the world. I bet if we combine our allowances we can buy a Club G logo shirt or a Club G teddy bear. We can take turns wearing the shirt and playing with the bear."

"The shirt will not fit me if it is big enough to fit you Karen. You are a fatso. I do not want the bear because it is a girl bear. I am a boy." Andrew said rudely.

I was very mad. Fatso? Who did Andrew think he was? I slapped Andrew and jumped on top of him. I began pulling his hair. Andrew started to whine and cry so I kicked him.

"You are hurting me Karen! Stop please." Andrew sniffled through his tears.

I punched him harder, "You called me a fatso! You are a big meanie mo head Andrew. What did I even do to you to deserve being called a fatso?"

Andrew started to yell, "Mommy! Mommy!"

I covered his mouth with my hand. Andrew was getting what he deserved. I did not want Mommy to rescue him. He is spoiled and stupid. I told him so. "You are a spoiled rotten brat. I do not like you."

Unfortunately for me Mommy rushed into the room and pulled me off of Andrew. "Karen! What is the meaning of this?"

"Andrew is a rude brother. I do not like him. He called me a fatso. I am not fat but he is a meanie mo." I pointed at Andrew who was sitting on the floor sniffling and crying. He had a bloody nose. I felt quite proud of myself when I saw it.

"Karen you are a liar. Mommy she tried to force me to look at her Club G catalog. And when I said no thank you she began acting very mean and was going to hurt me." Andrew looked very pathetic and convincing as he lied to Mommy. It was so unfair. He knew I did nothing wrong and it was all his fault.

Mommy sent me to my room. I was mad at how unfair she was being but I still had my catalog. I sat down on my bed and tried to forget about how Andrew had tricked Mommy and gotten out of trouble again. What a brat! I began making a list of things from the catalog I wanted. Maybe Daddy would order some of them for me. I was going to his house tomorrow. I could hardly wait.


	2. Double The Karen Double The Fun

Chapter 2

Double The Karen Double The Fun

I guess I should tell you why my daddy has a separate house than me. It is because my mommy and daddy are divorced. A long time ago they fell in love and got married. Then after that they had me and then they had Andrew. One day my mommy and daddy decided they did not love each other anymore but they still loved Andrew and me a lot. They loved me way more than Andrew but that's beside the point. Anyway they got divorced and Mommy moved to a little house. Daddy stayed in the big house. It is because he is a millionaire and he owns a mansion. Mommy is poor and owns a shack. Do not tell her I said that though or her feelings will be hurt.

The divorce is not the end of the story though. Guess what? My mommy met Seth and married him. He moved into the little house with us. He is my stepfather. My daddy met Elizabeth and married her. She is my stepmother. Elizabeth had three sons Charlie, Sam and David Michael. They are my stepbrothers. She has a daughter named Kristy who is my stepsister. Sometimes Kristy babysits me and Andrew but I do not think this is fair. I think I should be allowed to stay by myself. Then I can finally finish my spell to burn down Morbidda Destiny's house. She is the witch that lives next door to Daddy. She got a restraining order on me. A restraining order means I am supposed to stay away and leave her alone. Daddy makes sure I do because he says I embarrassed him by harassing "Mrs. Porter" to the point she had to call the police. "Mrs. Porter" is the name that Morbidda Destiny scammed all the grown ups into calling her. Only I am brave enough to admit the truth and soon the world will be free of her scourge. Well just as soon as I can spend a little time at the big house without the grownups or teenagers around. Andrew and David Michael are young enough and stupid enough I could distract them with video games. So is Emily Michelle. Emily Michelle is the toddler that Daddy and Elizabeth adopted from Vietnam. She is a spoiled baby. I do not like her or Elizabeth. I pretend to get along with Elizabeth but I really hate her. She is my wicked stepmother just like Cinderella so I am supposed to hate her. She is really nice and I wish I could like her but since it is like in Cinderella I have to hate her.

I am really special because I have two houses and two families. I am even more special because I have two of everything else. I have two stuffed kitties, two blanket pieces, two allowances, two bedrooms, two pairs of roller skates and even two best friends Hannie and Nancy. Hannie is my big house best friend because her family is rich like Daddy. Nancy is my little house best friend because her family is poor like Mommy. I am jelly of Nancy because she has a real live baby named Daniel living at her house. I just have stinky Emily Michelle. She is not a baby but she is no fun either. She is like Andrew: whiny, spoiled and dumb. I think I like Nancy the best because of the baby but before that I liked Hannie best because she is rich and has better toys. We call ourselves the Three Musketeers because we are one for all and all for one. We do not let other kids play with us because Three Musketeers means three only. We are nice to them but we do not consider them our friends.  
We also have pets. There is Midgie and Rockie at the little house. They are really Seth's pets but Andrew likes them. I have my rat who I named Emily after Emily Michelle. They both look the same and act the same: stinky and ugly. Everyone thought it was so cute how I named Emily after her but they would be sad if they knew why I did it. At the big house there is Shannon and Pumpkin. There is also a fish named Crystal Light. The grown ups think I am stupid and tell me it is the same fish that has always been there but I know it is really Crystal Light the tenth. We used to have a cat named Boo Boo but Morbidda Destiny killed him with a hex. Daddy says Boo Boo died of old age but I know he is lying. This is why someday I will have my revenge on Morbidda Destiny.

Anyway on the day Andrew the meanie mo called me a fatso, I had to start packing for Daddy's house. I made sure the Club G catalog was the first thing I packed. Most things I need are already at Daddy's house but I always bring my backpack for school since my mean teacher Ms. Colman refuses to give me two text books. I do not know which part of I am Karen Two Two and I need two of everything she does not get but Daddy and Mommy did not argue with her.

"Karen?" Mommy called, "Phone for you!"

"Oh goody! I must be off punishment." I squealed to my rat. I bounded downstairs and grabbed the phone.

"Karen," said Mommy as I put the phone up to my ear. "It is Hannie. As soon as you are done on the phone, you need to go back up to your room. Your punishment is not over."

Boo and bull frogs. Hopefully Hannie had a lot to say and this would be a long phone call. "Hi Hannie!"

"Hi Karen! You will not believe the surprise I have for you. I know you are coming to the big house soon so when you get there I will tell you. I am so excited I feel like I will burst." Hannie was very excited.

"Why not now?" I demanded.

"Because it is more fun to surprise you, Karen. I will give you one big hint though." Hannie giggled.

I sighed, "What is the hint?"

"Bring over your new Club G catalog when you come to my house. It is part of the surprise. I need to go now. Bye Karen!" Hannie hung up.

I was very annoyed with Hannie. I am too impatient to wait to find out any kind of secret and she knows it. Oh well I would be at the big house very soon and then I could go to Hannie's. The secret must be about Club G if Hannie wanted me to bring my catalog. I could not wait to find out what it was.


	3. Hannie's Surprise

Chapter 3

Hannie's Surprise

Saturday morning was the start of a month at the big house. Andrew and I live one month at the big house and one month at the little house. I had been hoping that Daddy and Elizabeth would end my punishment from Mommy for beating up Andrew but I was not so lucky. I was banished from television for week. Guess what punishment Andrew got. He did not get in trouble at all for calling me a fatso. How unfair. At least I had Hannie's big surprise to look forward to.

Nannie had cooked pancakes and scrambled eggs for breakfast. Nannie is Elizabeth's mother. She is one of my grandmas. I have more grandmas than anybody else I know. If there was a world record for having the most grandmas: it would go to me Karen Brewer. Foster grandparents, step-grandparents, and regular grandparents… You name it and I have one. I think that is pretty special. Some people like Andrew and Pamela Harding just roll their eyes when I talk about it. This is because Andrew is stupid and Pamela is a big meanie mo.

I wolfed down three pancakes and a big serving of scrambled eggs. I downed all of it with a glass of orange juice. I was in a very big hurry to get over to Hannie's house to find out what the surprise was.

"Karen, slow down and take small bites please," Daddy reminded me.

"Ok Daddy," I answered but I did not really listen. No way was Daddy going to slow down me finding out about the surprise by anything as silly as manners. Manners are not as important as the Three Musketeers.

"Karen, I am warning you," Daddy sounded very angry but the doorbell saved me from him.

"I will get it," I said importantly. Before anyone could argue with me I ran to the front door and left my dirty dishes behind. Daddy was calling me to come back and clear my spot but I did not care. Someone had to open the door and it may as well be me.

I flung the door open. It was Hannie. She was carrying a hot pink tote bag. I could see the latest Club G catalog inside of it. Hannie waved at me, "Hi Karen! I could not wait to tell you what the surprise is so I came over as soon as my parents said I could."

I shrieked with delight, "Oh Hannie, please you must tell me what it is. I can not wait any longer to find out."

"Karen, let me come inside first," Hannie said. Hannie is impatient and very demanding but she is my friend so I am nice to her. I do not understand why she is mean sometimes. I do not think that making me let her inside before she tells me a big secret is very nice. I think she is just jelly of Daddy's house. Our mansion is better than their mansion.

I let Hannie inside and we went upstairs to me room. I sat on my bed and Hannie was going to climb up next to me until I shook me head at her so she sat in my desk chair and pulled it next to the bed. I do not like other people to sit on my bed. One time I heard Daddy say that a man is the king of his castle, which means his house so I say I am queen of my castle, which means my bedroom, and my bed is my throne. One time I invited Pamela Harding for a sleepover and Elizabeth let her sleep in my bed. I was gigundoly mad about that. I made Nannie wash my sheets the very next day. I do not know why we do not have a maid at Daddy's house to do the chores. I should not have to clean my own room with a millionaire for a daddy but I have to anyway. Boo and bullfrogs.

"So? What is the surprise Hannie?" I was getting annoyed that she had a big secret but I did not know it yet.

"Well," said Hannie, "My daddy has a cousin who just got a job working for Club G. He is going to be a store manager. A manager is a person who…"

I stopped Hannie, "I already know what a manager is. If your daddy's cousin's new job is the surprise than you cheated me Hannie Papadakis. I wasted all my time waiting for a surprise and then you tell me about someone getting a job at a store I cannot go to. That is not fair at all Hannie."

"Well Karen, I just thought that you would think it was cool that I know someone who is going to work at Club G. That was not all of my surprise but since you are being rude I guess you do not want to know what the rest is." Hannie picked up her tote bag and headed to the door of my bedroom. How rude.

"Wait Hannie! Do not go please. I want to hear the rest of your story. I will not interrupt again." Hannie was not going to be rude like that to me. I deserved to hear the rest of the story.

"All right Karen," Hannie sat back down. "Well my daddy's cousin's new job will be at a new Club G store. It will not be at one of the stores that are already open."

The stores that are already open are in Atlanta, Los Angeles, Chicago, Boston, and Dallas and of course New York City. I really was starting to get curious about where Club G would open a store. "And?" I prompted Hannie for more information.

"Well," Hannie began. "Club G is planning to open 10 more retail stores soon in many different cities. One of those cities is Stamford."

For a moment I stared at Hannie in disbelief. I could not believe it. Club G? In Stamford? That is so close to us. I could not help myself. I began to scream. I grabbed Hannie's hands and she began to scream with me. I do not know why she was excited. She already knew about Club G so it was my turn to be excited. Stupid Hannie is always stealing from me when it is my time to shine. It is because she is a gigundoly jelly meanie mo person.

Anyway we screamed until Elizabeth came upstairs and told us to be quiet. I told her that Club G was the best thing ever and that Hannie and I deserved to be allowed a few minutes to scream. She gave me a warning so I dropped it. Hannie and I had way too many plans to make to keep screaming anyway. We had to plan exactly what we were going to do on the grand opening day of Club G in Stamford. Plus we had to call Nancy since the Three Musketeers have to do everything together. I could hardly wait.


	4. Big Plans

Chapter 4

Big Plans

Immedietely after Hannie and I finished shrieking over the grand opening of the Club G store in Stamford we began making plans for our trip there. We had not been given permission yet to go and had not asked our parents to take us but we had to go. We could not just stay home in Stoneybrook knowing that Club G was opening in Stamford. Besides there was just no way any of our mommies or daddies would say no.

"Karen I think we should make shopping lists of what we are going to buy at Club G and then we should count our money up so we know what we can afford to buy." Hannie suggested.

"Oh that is a good idea, Hannie!" I complimented her. Inside though, I was a teeny bit jelly. Why did Hannie always come up with good ideas when I did not?

"I am going to run home and get my piggy bank. I will be right back." Hannie ran out of the room before I could say anything to her.

I went and got my purse out of the backpack I had brought with me to Daddy's house. I used to have a piggy bank but I broke it in a fit of rage when I did not have enough money for the ice cream man. I suspect Andrew robbed me but Mommy said I spent it all at the candy store and the plastic wrappers on my floor prove it. I do not think Mommy has a clue about how evil Andrew really is.

I opened my purse and poured out all my money onto my bed. I counted it and frowned. Ten dollars and thirty three cents was my grand total. Boo and bullfrogs. That was not enough money to get much of anything at Club G. I sighed sadly. Maybe my parents would loan me money or maybe Hannie was rich enough for both us and feeling generous.

I decided to open up my Club G catalog and start pricing things while I waited for Hannie to come back. The best thing at Club G is the "Beary Best Girl Friends". They are a group of fancy teddy bears. There are five of them and they each come with a story book, an outfit and accessories. Aisha is a black bear with lots of long black braids. Belinda is a white bear with long blonde hair. Celia is a brown bear with black hair in a bob. Dana is a reddish brown bear with curly brown hair. Emily is a tan bear with red hair. Each bear costs seventy five dollars and comes with an outfit, a hair brush, a story book, and a backpack with accessories from her story. Any outfit you can buy for your bear you can buy for yourself. If you pay a hundred dollars you can buy a special customized bear with hair, fur, eyes, outfit and accessories you choose. The bear also comes with a blank journal and a Club G pen so you could write a story for your bear. I really wanted a Karen Brewer bear plus a matching outfit and accessories for me.

I took out a piece of paper and a box of crayons and began drawing my bear. She would have the peachy white fur, blue eyes, blonde ponytail, glasses, jeans with gem stones and a Club G logo, a Club G long sleeved logo t-shirt, a jean jacket, Club G socks, Club G tennis shoes, Club G barrettes, Club G backpack, and a Club G birthstone earrings and necklace set. I would get all of it for me too.

I was adding up the price totals for everything I wanted when Hannie came back. "Hi Karen! I am back."

"Oh goody," I greeted her. "How much money do you have?"

Hannie sighed, "Karen I have not opened my piggy bank to count yet. I was in a hurry to get back over here. I will open it and you can help me count it now."

I helped Hannie count the money that was in her piggy bank. She did not have much money either but it was more than I had. Hannie had fifteen dollars and seventy eight cents. Neither of us had much money.

"We should call Nancy and invite her to come over so we can plan for Club G. It is something that the Three Musketeers should do together." I was happy I had the idea before Hannie did.

Hannie thought this was a good idea so we called Nancy and invited her over. Her parents would not let her come until after lunch time even when we told them the gigundoly great news about Club G opening up in Stamford. Hannie and I spent the morning telling our families all about Club G and making our shopping lists.

When I asked Daddy and Elizabeth about going to the grand opening of Club G the only answer they would give me was; "We will discuss it with your mother and Seth."

Hannie's parents were not much better, "We will see, Hannie. We do not know yet."

Needless to say Hannie and I were getting very impatient by the time Nancy arrived with a Club G catalog in one hand and her piggy bank in the other.

"I can stay for three hours while Mommy takes Daniel with her to the grocery store." Nancy announced as she came through my front door.

Of course Hannie and I were really only interested in how much money Nancy had but we did not say so because Nancy is our friend. It would probably sound really greedy if we did but we were very curious.

Nancy shook her piggy bank and said proudly, "I have fifteen dollars and thirteen cents saved up."

Hannie and I were both pretty jelly to hear that. How could Nancy be the richest of the three of us when her family was the poorest? We did not want to hurt her feelings so we did not tell her how jelly we were.

Hannie said, "We do not have enough money to buy things at Club G and our parents still have not said yes. Maybe we will not get to go at all."

"You are right, Hannie. Fifteen dollars is a lot of money at the normal toy store and a lot of money for the candy store but it is not a lot of money for Club G." Nancy began to pout as she said this.

Then I had a really gigundoly wonderful idea. "I know what we can do to get money. We can start a business. We can do chores for people and make crafts and sell the. We can have a lemonade stand."

Nancy and Hannie thought that was a great idea so we spent the rest of the afternoon making crafts. We would sell them at school on Monday and we would be rolling in dough for Club G in no time.


	5. KHN Incorporated

Chapter 5

KHN Incorporated

By Monday morning, we were ready. It had been a very productive weekend for all of us. The Three Musketeers arrived at school with bags of crafts and snacks we had made to sell on the playground. We could not wait until recess time. We had named our company "KHN Incorporated". It looked very official using our initials and an important grown up word.

We had a surprise at school though. It turned out that the news about Club G had been on the news that morning and now everyone at school knew about the store coming to Stamford. Every girl in Ms. Coleman's class was planning to go and was talking about how much money she had saved. Oh no! What if they were all so greedy about their own Club G trip that they did not want to spend their money on KHN Incorporated items to fund our trip to Club G? I could not stand for it if they were. Sometimes I really don't like the kids at school. They are greedy and selfish and think of themselves before they think of me; Karen Brewer.

There is a rumor going around that Ms. Coleman let me be in her wedding only because I threw a huge tantrum and my parents were worried that my teacher would get a restraining order against me just like Morbidda Destiny did so Daddy paid Ms. Coleman a lot of money to let me help. It is a lie of course. Ms. Coleman loves me a lot and would never accept money for the privilege of having the one and only Karen Brewer in her wedding. That rumor is the reason that some kids do not like me at school and are big meanie mos to me. I am glad Andrew does not go to my school because he said the same thing to me that the meanie mo kids said about the wedding. I do not know how he knew the rumor. When I beat him up for saying it, Mommy said Andrew was right and she did not understand how I could forget my tantrum over the wedding so easily.

At recess we set our business up on a table that Ms. Coleman generously offered to loan us. Hannie said she has been scared of me ever since the wedding and that is why she loaned us the table but Hannie is just super jelly of me and always has been.

We had a gigundo amount of things for sale. We had both snacks and crafts. We were selling snacks like homemade cookies, brownies, pretzels and cake. We had made crib mobiles, clay animals, paper plate masks, paper bag puppets, paintings, collages, pencil cans made out of soup cans and wrapping paper, ornaments and jewelry. I just knew that the Three Musketeers would be rich from the sale.

The snack sale was going very well especially the cookies. Ricky bought five of them and I know it is because he is in luv with me. Hannie said it is because he is a fat pig who will eat anything but I ignored her. I started to notice something not so good about the sale. For one thing the crafts really were not selling which was easy enough to blame on Nancy and Hannie's lack of artistic talent which was dragging my brilliance down. However, the thing that really worried me was that only boys were buying anything. I did not understand why none of our other friends were buying anything.

After recess I decided to confront Natalie Springer and Sara Ford in the bathroom about them not buying stuff. "Hi why did you not buy anything from us? I do not think it was very friendly of you to not want to support Hannie, Nancy and I going to the grand opening of Club G."

Natalie and Sara looked at each other nervously without saying anything but finally Natalie spoke up. "Well Karen, you see all of us girls are saving our money for Club G."

"Yeah you are not the only ones who want to go there." Sara chimed in.

I really wanted to slap them both. I tried to restrain myself but finally I gave in to my urges and tackled Natalie. "You big fat meanie mo!"

Natalie had begun to cry, "You let me go please Karen."

I began punching her and ignored Sara trying to pull me off. "I will not stop until you spend all that you have on my sale."

Sara ran out and returned in a minute with Ms. Coleman who yanked me off of Natalie and sat me a chair next to her in the classroom. She made me sit there until it was time to go home. Boo and bullfrogs to Ms. Coleman. She is a meanie mo.

After school, the Three Musketeers had big plans for more money making ideas so I was eager to get out of there. Nancy was coming to the big house neighborhood and we were going to have a lemonade stand in front of my house plus a yard sale. We would sell all the extra snacks and craft stuff and we had found old stuff from our houses to sell.

"Come to KHN's gigundo super sale!" I shrieked from the top of a lawn chair. "It is the best sale on earth!"

"It is a junk sale," Andrew piped up. He was sitting on the grass playing with toy cars. "No one is going to buy your garbage."

I threatened Andrew with a shake of the fist and what I like to call my tiger growl. He ran scared to the backyard dropping one of his cars behind him. I picked up the car and slapped a price tag on it. Andrew really should do his part to fund my trip to Club G even if it is just a toy car. He is such a spoiled brat anyway and has way more cars than he needs.

We did not have as many customers as we were hoping but a lot of our families and the neighborhood grown ups felt sorry for us and bought things. At the end of the day we had not sold everything but we had sold a lot.

The three of us sat down before dinner and counted our totals for the day. Divided three ways, we each got five dollars and ninety seven cents. It was not a lot but maybe we could sell more things before the Club G opening. I could hardly wait. We only had five more days to wait because Club G was this Saturday. It meant we would all get our allowances before then too so that was a little more money. And maybe just maybe our parents would buy us each a present at Club G. Dreams of Club G filled our heads. It was going to be the best day ever.


	6. Grand Opening

Chapter 6

Grand Opening

It was finally Saturday. That meant it was the grand opening day of Club G. I got up early wondering what to wear. I did not own any Club G clothing but I wanted to make sure I looked gigundoly cool. Finally I decided on a red and white striped t-shirt, white capri pants with red trim, and red clogs with white trim. I put my hair in a pony tail with a red scrunchy. I was all ready to go. I had twenty five dollars and twelve cents saved from my allowance and all of KHN's hard work.

Mommy was picking me up at the big house. She was taking me to Club G even though it was Daddy's month for me and Andrew. Daddy and Mommy decided that Club G was really more of a mother daughter activity. Mommy would have Nancy and her mommy in her car and we would be picking up Hannie and her mommy too.

I could barely eat because I was so excited. Nannie convinced me to eat a bowl of oatmeal with a banana sliced on top. After I ate, I paced in front of the front window while watching for Mommy. Finally she pulled up and I ran out the door swinging my purse at my side. I yelled a quick goodbye to my big house family and hopped into Mommy's car. Hannie and her Mommy were walking down the street towards us. I waved excitedly and waited for Hannie to get to the car before I got in.

"Oh I just cannot wait!" I squealed as Hannie and I buckled our seatbelts.

Hannie nodded, "It will feel like the longest car ride ever. That is how excited I am."

"I am excited too. I barely slept last night." Nancy informed us as she bounced up and down on the seat.

I saw our mommies exchange looks that seemed a bit annoyed with us but I did not care at all. Club G was going to be the best place ever. I imagined it to be even better than Disneyland or any of the other places I have gotten to go because I have a rich daddy.

The drive to the mall seemed to take forever. Mommy made it worse by pulling through a drive-thru espresso stand to get coffee for her self and the other grown-ups. She did not get anything for me no matter how nicely I asked because according to Mommy coffee is for grown-ups.

"But Mommy…" I said hoping she would change her mind.

Mommy's eyes stared into me like daggers through the rearview mirror. She was pretty mad at me. "But nothing, Karen Brewer. When I say no it means exactly that. Stop whining and acting like a spoiled brat or we will turn right around and drop you off at home. Then the rest of us will spend the day at Club G without you."

I clamped my mouth shut. Mommy is so unfair and she is mean. I could not believe she was trying to ruin my special day at Club G by threatening to take me home and calling me a whiny, spoiled brat. I am not a whiny, spoiled brat. Those words describe people like Andrew and Pamela Harding but they do not describe people like the one and only Karen Brewer.

Finally we arrived at the mall. We had to park almost a million miles away from the entrance. Mommy said a lot of people must be there for the opening of Club G. I was feeling mad at Mommy for not driving us faster but there was nothing I could do about it except make a mad dash for the mall entrance as fast as I could.

Off I ran with Mommy yelling at me to wait for her. Suddenly I felt someone grab my arm. It was a mall security guard. His name tag said his name was Bob. He held my arm until Mommy caught up to me.

"Young lady," Bob stated, "It is a safety hazard for a little girl to run in the mall parking lot without a grown up. You should stay with your mother."

I stuck my tongue out at Bob for not minding his own business. Mommy swatted me on the behind for it. But it did not matter since we were at the doors to the mall. I pulled Mommy's hand so we could get there faster.

Inside there was a crowd in front of Club G waiting to look inside. I demanded that Mommy lift me up so I could see inside better but she said I was much too big for her to lift. Boo and bullfrogs.

We waited for about fifteen minutes to get inside. It was the longest fifteen minutes of my life. I felt like I would die without seeing the insides of Club G. Finally we made it inside the store just before I felt like I would burst from excitement.

Club G was beautiful. It was better than it had been in my dreams. There was a directory sign in the front of the store which told where everything was. It was almost as big as Bellair's. I looked at the sign wondering where we should go first.

Mommy said, "We should start at the first level of the store so we can see everything there then go to the second story. Once we have seen the whole store we can pick out souvenirs and then we can head to the Club G café for lunch."

The other grown ups agreed with Mommy so off we started on our tour of the store. There was a section where girl's clothing was, the Beary Best Girlfriends area, the theater where you could watch cartoons about the bears, the furniture department, the accessory department, the candy shop, the Club G logo and souvenir shop, an area which sold school supplies and stationary, a Club G arts and crafts zone, the Club G game area, the Club B zone which was a playroom for boys who had to come to Club G with their families, the Club G junior area which had a playroom for toddlers and a shopping area for little girls like Emily Michelle, the Club G café and so much more.

Hannie, Nancy and I wanted to see everything and do everything all at once but the part we were looking forward to the most was buying things. It was going to be a really great day. I just knew it would be wonderful and as we headed into the store I felt myself grow even giddier with excitement.


	7. Five Hundred Dollars

Chapter 7

Five Hundred Dollars

Club G was amazing. Hannie, Nancy and I tried to take it all in at once but it was really hard to. The store was decorated in Club G colors which are red, white, blue, gold and silver. We knew we had to start somewhere though and it had to be on the first floor. Mommy had already said so.

First we looked at the girl's clothing section. I saw the outfit that Pamela Harding already owns. The price tag said the sweatshirt cost forty five dollars and ninety nine cents. The hat cost nineteen dollars and ninety nine cents. I could afford the hat but I could not afford the sweatshirt. I could not afford the seventy five dollar jeans or the fifty dollar mini skirt either. There was a forty five dollar denim jacket which matched the jeans and skirt but I could not afford that.

"Hannie can I borrow money from you? I really want to buy a sweatshirt but I can not afford it." I decided to ask Hannie for money first since she has a richer daddy than Nancy does so she can afford to loan me money easier than Nancy.

"No Karen. If I loan you money I will not be able to buy anything for myself." Hannie sounded a little mad with me for asking but I did not understand why since she is my best friend and real friends would do anything for each other.

I stuck out my lower lip and turned to Nancy, "Nancy, can I--?"

Nancy interrupted me before I could even ask her for money, "Karen, that is unfair of you to even ask us so the answer is no."

I sighed but I was not going to let Nancy and Hannie's selfishness ruin my day at Club G. We headed to the area where school and art supplies were sold next. They even had pencil top erasers with the Club G logo on it. It was gigundoly cool but the erasers cost one dollar and fifty cents a piece which made Mommy angry since you can buy a pack of ten plain pink erasers for that price at the office supply store. Well that is because Mommy does not understand how cool Club G is.

We went through the accessory and souvenir areas next. I did not know how I was going to decide what to buy with my money. Mommy had still not said anything about spending extra on me on top of the money I had brought myself. I hoped she was saving that for a special surprise. I could see myself with a pair of Club G earrings and a matching necklace but it was forty dollars for the whole set. I could also see my bedrooms both covered in Club G posters from the souvenir department.

Next we checked out the furniture department. I could see my bedroom decorated in Club G sheets, Club G curtains, and a Club G television with a Club G sofa to watch it from. Hannie and Nancy had a mock pillow fight with a few Club G pillows. I was too busy checking prices to join in but it looked like fun.

The very best place in the store was the Beary Best Girlfriends section. There were so many bears and accessories. I wanted it all. I hugged a box with a bear in it to my chest.

"Mommy?" I looked around for my mommy. She was looking at a twenty five dollar bear outfit and shaking her head in disbelief at the price tag.

Mommy turned to look at me, "Yes, Karen?"

"Will you buy me a bear?" I boldly asked her. She had to say yes though. I am her only daughter and I really deserved a bear.

Mommy did not say yes or no. She said, "How much does the bear cost, Karen?"

"One hundred dollars for a custom bear and seventy five dollars for a Beary Best Friend story bear." I chewed my lower lip and tried to look cute and sad.

Mommy sighed, "Karen, I told you before we came that you would have to earn your own money and buy the things you wanted at Club G. It is not Christmas or your birthday and you have not behaved very well lately. You have been very mean to Andrew and disrespectful to me and other adults. I also do not think you have been a very good friend to Hannie and Nancy. You have not done anything to earn a gift at all and there is no special occasion. I am not going to buy you anything today except for lunch. If you want something extra today you will use your own money to buy it."

I was very mad and reached up to slap Mommy. She grabbed my hand before I could and marched me right over to the toddler playroom. I did not understand what she was doing.

"My daughter really needs a break. Can she stay here in the toddler center or go into the boy's playroom? I will come and get her in a little while." Mommy led me up to the person at the counter.

"Of course she can stay here," said the counter person for the baby room. "If she gets bored we are connected to the boy room through that door. We have a Playstation."

Mommy turned to Hannie, Nancy and their mommies, "All right ladies we will visit the rest of the store including the arts and crafts and the movie theater then we will come back and get Karen for lunch."

I was mortified. How dare Mommy treat me like a baby! I scowled as I watched them walk away from me. I watched the toddlers dejectedly from a plastic Club G chair for awhile. The stupid babies seemed just like Emily Michelle. By that I mean they did not own brains and were drooly and smelly.

An ugly meanie mo baby came and threw a block at me as I was stewing in my anger. That is when I decided I would have to make a break for it. I could not stay in this baby jail any longer.

I took my chance when the person running the baby jail turned around to rummage through a baby's diaper bag. The baby was poopy. I snuck out the gate and decided that I needed to get revenge on Mommy. I was going to buy everything in the store and charge it. I do not really know what charge means but sometimes Daddy takes me somewhere and he tells the store people to charge it.

I ran around like a maniac filling a Club G shopping basket with everything I wanted. I stuck in a bear, clothes for me, jewelry, make up, and accessories for me and the bear. Then I marched myself up to the cash register.

The cashier did not say anything to me as she rang up my items. I felt very proud of myself for breaking out of the baby jail and getting what I deserved. That would show Mommy who was boss.

"Five hundred dollars and sixty one cents is your total." The cashier announced.

I smiled at her with my prettiest grin. "Charge it!"

She looked at the lady in line behind me expectantly. "Credit card and ID ma'am."

The woman behind me looked confused, "She is not my daughter."

The cashier gave me a mean look, "Little girl where is your mommy?"

I pretended to look confused, "Uh I do not know."

The cashier took my hand and pulled me inside the register. There was a stool inside and she had me sit on it. "What is your mommy's name?"

I was caught. "Lisa Engle." I said this in a tiny whisper hoping the cashier would not hear me but she did. She called Mommy's name over the loud speaker and asked her to come to register two. All I could do was sit down on the stool and wait.


	8. NO spells No

Chapter 8

N-O spells No

I was still sitting at the cash register with my head in my hands when I heard Mommy's voice. "KAREN BREWER!"

I jumped at the sound of her screaming. Mommy did not need to scream at me. She was the one who was wrong here. I was right because I deserved to have what I wanted from Club G and I deserved to have her pay for all of it.

"Karen! I left you in the playroom. How did you get out and what is going on here?" Mommy did not look happy with me but I did not care. It was all her fault I was in this mess. The look on Mommy's face made me realized I had better not say anything so I clamped my mouth shut.

The cashier explained to Mommy what had happened and Mommy looked angrier with me as she heard the cashier's side. Of course she did not ask to hear my side of things and that made me angry too. I still did not say anything because I had a feeling Mommy would spank me then and there if I did. Mommy did not buy the things I had selected. Instead, she pulled me by my arm back to the toddler playroom. I kicked and hit but Mommy is much stronger than I am. She is also much bigger and fatter.

"My daughter escaped from your playroom. I feel that is a safety hazard. Please try to keep a better eye on her." Mommy snapped at the loser running the baby jail.

Then Mommy turned to me and screamed right in my face. I was gigundoly mad. "KAREN BREWER! I do not know what you were trying to pull. You will not be spending any money on anything at Club G today. You will be staying here while the rest of us go to the café for lunch. You can eat something once I get you back to your father's house. I am recommending that he put you back on severe punishment due to your antics. I did not raise you to be a spoiled, dishonest brat and I do not think your father did either. I will not allow you to ruin the day for your friends so we will come and get you after our day is over."

Mommy stormed off and I stuck my tongue out at her fat behind as she left. I do not understand her since I do not deserve to be punished at all for this. I will get my Club G merchandise no matter what Mommy says. I just have to think of a plan.

I spotted a stack of paper and a box of Club G color crayons on a table. Since I was stuck in the baby jail and the jerk running it was watching me like a hawk this time, I figured I could find an alternative way to entertain myself by brainstorming ideas on how to get my Club G merchandise.

I poised a red crayon above the paper while I thought of an idea. I thought and I thought but only one idea came into my head. That idea was to shoplift. Shoplift means stealing. I could not steal. I would get in a lot of trouble. I pouted but then I had another though. It is not like I had never stolen before. One time my daddy gave my stepsister Kristy an heirloom pin and I stole it and lost it. I was mad because she is only his fake daughter so she should be happy that he even lets her eat crumbs and have a spot on the floor to sleep on. All of Daddy's riches should go to me.

On the other hand, stealing could get me in a lot of trouble and then my parents would never buy anything at Club G for me. Stealing had to be a last resort after I'd exhausted my other options. At first I thought I had done that but then I realized that I had a few other choices. First I could try asking my daddy and see if maybe he was feeling more generous than Mommy. Second, I could try earning money with KHN again. Third I could try to borrow money from the rest of my family. Fourth I could steal from them if they would not loan it to me. Fifth was the option to sneak to Club G and shoplift. I had a pretty good plan in place I felt. I hoped it would not come down to shoplifting but if it did it is because desperate times call for desperate measures. I would do whatever it took to get my hands on the Club G merchandise that was rightfully mine.

I was still mulling over my options when Hannie, Nancy and our mommies showed up. Mommy was still mad at me which was annoying since she should have just gotten over it by now. Honestly since I was innocent she should have been coming to me with a bag full of gifts and a big apology but she did not. Hannie and Nancy had bought things but they had not bought anything for me. I do not think they knew I was being punished. If they had known I am sure they would have bought me presents.

Mommy did not say anything to me. She just took my arm and we walked out to the car. I was gigundoly hungry but I did not want Mommy to embarrass me by yelling at me in front of my friends if I asked for food. Maybe Hannie and Nancy did know since they were not talking either. In fact, everyone was being very quiet.

The ride home was very depressing and quiet. Hannie, her mommy and I got out in the big house driveway. I watched them walk across the street. Mommy got out of the car and marched up to the door of the big house. I scurried after her. I did not know why Mommy was walking to the door with me. She usually just drops me off and stays in the car. Mommy was so angry I did not want to ask questions.

Mommy rung the doorbell and Daddy answered it. He came so quickly that he must have seen us pull up. "What is going on?" He asked Mommy.

"Thanks to Karen, the trip to Club G was a disaster. Her behavior was atrocious. I think we need to talk about a suitable consequence for how she behaved." Mommy told him.

"Well I think we should talk without Karen since you look very angry. Karen, go to your room please and I will let you know when your mother and I are done talking." Daddy gave me a look that said I better not argue.

But I could not resist asking Mommy, "Are you and Daddy going to decide when you are going to buy my presents from Club G? I think we should go back after I am not in trouble anymore since I did not get anything today and I really deserve something since Hannie and Nancy got things."

Mommy sighed, "Karen, I have already told you that you are not getting anything. N-O spells no. Please go to your room now."

I ran up the stairs to my room. I forced myself to fake cry on the way up there. Maybe tears would make them feel sorry for me. I was just sorry that my room was too far away to eavesdrop. I sat on my bed to wait for my sentencing.


	9. What Part of No Did You Not Understand?

Chapter 9

What Part of No Did You Not Understand?

I sat in my room with Moosie who is my stuffed cat on one side of me and half of Tickly my blanket on the other side. I was sitting on the floor inside my closet and waiting to find out what my punishment was. I was sort of hiding but I do not know why. Mommy was in the wrong here and not me. I just had to hope that Daddy would believe me his beautiful and much loved daughter over his hated ex-wife. Daddy has told me he does not hate Mommy but he has to hate her since he divorced her.

I heard a car starting in the driveway and I ran to my bedroom window to see whose car it was. It was Mommy's car. She was leaving. I smiled happily to myself. That meant that the evil hag of a mother I have was gone and my punishment was over. This called for a celebration. I tossed Moosie in the air and then I changed into a pair of sweater pants. Sweater pants are my special creation. All you do is you take a sweater and stick your legs through the arms. I turned on my radio and began doing a dance I like to call the sweater pants dance. It is hard to explain but there is a lot of hip shaking, butt bumping and arm waving. I do the sweater pants dance whenever I am extra happy and want to celebrate. I keep it a secret from everyone because I think people would be super jelly if they knew about the sweater pants dance. I know for a fact they were all jelly when I invented sweater pants.

I heard a knock on my bedroom door. It was Andrew. "Karen? Daddy says to come downstairs and eat something."

Yay! Andrew did not say anything about a punishment so I was off the hook. I took off my sweater pants and turned off my stereo. I put my regular clothes back on and ran downstairs to the kitchen. I had not realized it before but I was very hungry.

Kristy was in the kitchen, "Hello Karen. There is a plate of food for you on the table. After you eat your daddy wants to see you in his office."

Kristy left the kitchen and I checked out the food on the table. There was a peanut butter and grape jelly sandwich, some potato chips, two cookies and a glass of milk. It all looked gigundoly yummy. I sat down and started eating.

While I was eating I began thinking about why Daddy wanted to see me in his office. I hoped it was because he was ordering everything I wanted from Club G to make up for how mean Mommy had been to me today. Maybe Mommy had told me no about the things at Club G because she did not have enough money so that is why she really wanted to talk to Daddy. She just wanted to ask him for money so that is why she lied to him and said I was bad at the store. Mommy knows I was a perfect angel at Club G so there must be a reason why she lied to Daddy. I was not atrocious. Mommy was the one who behaved atrociously.

I finished eating and stuck my plate in the dishwasher. I think that proves how nice and helpful I am instead of being a spoiled monster like Mommy insists I am. After that I wiped down my space at the table with a washcloth and put the washcloth into the laundry hamper. Then I hauled myself down the hall to Daddy's office.

The door was partially open and Daddy was sitting at his desk but I knocked anyway. It is very polite to knock before going into someone's private space. I was proud of myself for thinking to do it. Usually I just barge into places because I forget to be polite and knock.

"Hi Daddy!" I said cheerfully, "You wanted to see me?" I was very excited and could not wait to find out how much wonderful stuff Daddy was ordering me from Club G.

However, Daddy did not look too happy. The angry look on his face made me feel confused. He looked so mad that he reminded me of Mommy. Maybe Mommy was taking lessons from Morbidda Destiny and had cast a spell on Daddy to give him an angry face. He had no reason to be mad that I could think of.

"Have a seat, Karen." Daddy said this through gritted teeth in a voice which was almost a growl.

I sat down in a leather, cushioned easy chair and looked at Daddy. "What is it Daddy?"

"Your behavior at Club G was appalling. It was ugly and embarrassing to your mother. You were disrespectful and mean. I cannot even think of a punishment severe enough for you to pay for your crimes." Daddy did not yell at me but he did not sound very nice either.

I did not understand. When was he going to get to the part about all the Club G things he was buying me? I decided to remind him about it. "Daddy, when do I get to have the things Mommy would not buy for me at Club G? Are you going to buy them for me?"

"No Karen. I am not going to buy you anything from Club G. Neither is your mother. Not now, not tomorrow and not ever. You have not shown us you deserve to have anything from Club G. Now, your mother and I have decided on a punishment. It is not severe enough to thoroughly discipline you for what you did today but it will have to suffice." Daddy looked at me with a mean, scary look in his eyes.

"Daddy, I really think you should buy me something from Club G. I really deserve it. It is not my fault Mommy is a big fat meanie mo liar who is so jelly of me that she has to make up stories so you will hate me just like you hate her." I could not believe Daddy was mad at me too. It just proved that Mommy was a witch like Morbidda Destiny.

"Karen, which part of no did you not understand? You will be on restriction for a month. You will only be allowed to talk to your friends at school. You will be confined to the house other than for school. No friends will be allowed to call or visit you and you will not be allowed to visit them. You will also be banned from television, video games and playing in the yard. In fact, the only rooms in the house you will be allowed in are your bedroom and your bathroom. Also no one in the family will be speaking to you for the entire month. Nannie will bring you your meals on a tray and you will be eating in your room. You will put the tray outside your room when you are done. You will not be speaking to anyone else either. Now go to your room. I am sick and tired of speaking to you." Daddy turned away from me.

I marched up to my room. I was gigundoly mad at how unfair Daddy was being. I would get my Club G merchandise one way or another and I would have my revenge on the entire family as well as Morbidda Destiny.


	10. Karen Incorporated

Chapter 10

Karen Incorporated 

Monday morning arrived at last. It could not get here fast enough for me. The rest of Saturday and then Sunday after Daddy had punished me were very long and lonely. I went between my bedroom and bathroom and back again. I even cleaned them both spotless and thought that maybe if I was extra good then Daddy would notice and end my punishment early. It did not work. True to Daddy's word, no one in the house spoke to me. I was not even allowed to see the pets. Boo and bullfrogs.

At least when I got to the school bus stop I could see Hannie. She waved at me. I waved back. It felt very good to be out of my house and with someone I could talk to.

"Hiya Karen! I called your house but David Michael told me about your punishment. He sounded a little too happy about it to me. I did not even get to tell you what I bought at Club G. I got a t-shirt and a set of Club G scrunchies for my hair. I am wearing them right now." Hannie gestured to the shirt and scrunchies I had not noticed before she had said anything.

"That is nice for you, Hannie but we need to talk about me and my problems this morning. I got nothing at Club G and now I am on punishment for a very long time. I really need things from Club G and I need you and Nancy to help me."

Hannie shrugged, "I do not know how to help you, Karen."

"I will tell you how you can help me. You and Nancy can help me by starting up KHN incorporated again. The only difference is that this time all the money will go to me because you and Nancy have already gotten something from Club G." I just knew Hannie would be excited to make more things for our business especially since the proceeds would be going to a good cause which is me; Karen Brewer.

Hannie surprised me though by saying, "Karen, I think that is very greedy of you. I am sorry that you got in trouble and did not get anything at Club G but that is not my fault. I am very tired of making things for the business. I would like to take a break and enjoy recess time again."

I sighed. Hannie was no help to me. I was about to beat her up but the school bus drove up to the curb right as I raised my hand to slap Hannie. Her back was turned to me so she could talk to her brother and she did not see me. Maybe Nancy would be more helpful and less selfish than Hannie.

Nancy said the same thing as Hannie. I do not understand what I am doing wrong that I have been cursed with such horrible friends. I decided that since they would not help me, I would have to help myself. The very next day I would start my own business called Karen Incorporated. That would teach Hannie and Nancy not to be such gigundo meanie mo heads to me.

That night I went home and began making more things to sell. I had a lot of time to do it since my family was still avoiding me. I guess it must be pretty hard to pretend like a member of your family as wonderful, sweet and pretty as me does not exist but my family was managing to do it. I knitted some pencil holders and crayon box covers. I sewed together felt bags for school supplied. I made some bracelets out of beads and string. I found some balloons to make balloon animals with. I stole all the mismatched socks out of the laundry room when no one was looking and snuck back to my room with them. I used the socks to make sock puppets and gigundoly cute bags for pencils and crayons. Then I crammed all my goodies into my backpack. I could not wait for tomorrow so I could sell it all.

I showed Hannie and Nancy my things to sell as soon as we were all at school together the next morning. Hannie and Nancy smiled but they did not say much. They also did not offer to help. Ms. Coleman did not offer to loan me a table again so I asked her but she said no. Boo and bullfrogs to you, Ms. Coleman.

At recess time, I found a sunny place in the grass and spread out my shop. Karen Incorporated was in business! I started yelling about my wonderful sale and then I waited for the customers to roll in. Only they did not roll in. It was more like they trickled in. There were not too many people interested in buying from Karen Incorporated. Even Hannie and Nancy told me they did not have money to buy anything. I think they are just big meanie mo liars.

I tried for the rest of the week to sell my items but I only made three dollars. At the rate I was going it was going to take forever to get the money I needed to buy everything I wanted. Thinking about it made me very sad. I could not even have a lemonade stand after school because I was on punishment and restricted to my bedroom and bathroom. It was just so unfair. I was not even getting my allowance. I shrieked for Daddy to come upstairs and pay me for being his wonderful daughter but he ignored me and I did not get an allowance.

I sat in my room on Friday night to brainstorm more ideas for getting money but until my punishment ended there was almost nothing I could do to earn money. Really I was pretty much out of honest ideas to earn money.

I frowned and cuddled Moosie to my chest, "Oh Moosie, this really is an unfair world we live in. It feels like everyone is conspiring against me to make me sad and unhappy. I know it is all Morbidda Destiny's fault. She taught Mommy and Daddy her bad magic spells and she put a curse on the house. If it was not for my restraining order I would go to her house and break the curse."

I knew that my situation was getting desperate. I did not have many options left for getting what I wanted. I was at the end of my rope. There was only one real choice left. That choice was to steal. I either had to steal money from my family and friends to buy the things I wanted or I had to steal the items directly from the Club G store. I did not know what I was going to do but it would have to be drastic.


	11. Plan B

Chapter 11

Plan B

I decided that my first order of business would be to steal money from my big house family. I would feel less guilty stealing money from my family because they owed me. I wanted shoplifting from Club G to be my last resort. I should have had my family willingly providing all the Club G merchandise I wanted but since they were not, I would just take the money that was rightfully mine. Another reason they owed me was that my allowance had been cut off. If Daddy would not pay me my allowance then I would just take it from his wallet and pay myself.

Now that I had made the decision to steal money from my family, I had to decide how I was going to manage to steal. I was confined to my bedroom and I would have been caught very easily if I left it since this house is crawling with people.

I thought about sneaking around at night at stealing while everyone was asleep but I was worried that I might wake people up and be caught. It seemed like everyone kept his or her wallet or piggy bank in the bedroom where he or she slept. Andrew actually slept with his piggy bank cuddled in bed with him. He told Mommy that this is because I stole from him one day last summer to buy ice cream from the ice cream man. This is a lie. I just borrowed the money. I paid it back the instant Mommy threatened to cut off my allowance for two weeks as punishment. I am not a selfish, greedy meanie mo like some people I can think of in this family.

Maybe I could find a way to make my family extra sleepy so they would not wake up easily. It was times like these that I wished I had been friendlier to Morbidda Destiny so that she would teach me her evil magic spells.

Thinking about Morbidda Destiny and sleep made me remember a time before she had gotten that silly restraining order on me. I had been staying up at night so I could sneak out of the house to spy on her. Daddy found out and he had Nannie start giving me a teaspoon of vanilla flavored medicine. It made me too sleepy to stay up and spy on Morbidda Destiny. Nannie had kept the yucky syrup in the medicine cabinet in my bathroom. She put it on the top shelf.

I wondered if the medicine was still there. If it was I had a brilliant idea. I ran off to my bathroom to find out. Unfortunately I remembered that I am too short to reach the top shelf of my medicine cabinet. I went back to my room and dragged my desk chair in. I hoped that no one would hear me.

I was very happy to find the sleep medicine still in my cupboard. An evil plan had formed in my head. I was going to pour the sleep syrup into food while my big family was not looking. Then they would sleep very soundly and I would be able to rob them. By the time they woke up and noticed the money was gone, I would have all the things I wanted and needed from Club G.

Now all I needed was an opportunity to pour the medicine into food without getting caught. I was worried I would not get the chance but the next day, I woke up and heard Daddy outside of my room in the hallway. He was talking to Kristy's friend Jessi. Did you know that Jessi is black? I think that is pretty cool.

Daddy said to Jessi, "It will just be Karen here today. The rest of us will be having a picnic and a hike at a state park two hours from here. Karen is to stay in her room or her bathroom. Deliver lunch for her at noon. Just leave it outside her door and she will get it. She will leave her dishes outside in the hallway at one so you can take them then. You may watch the television and help yourself to anything in the kitchen to eat. Just do not talk to Karen or allow her to leave her room. That is my only real rule for the day. Oh and do not worry about the crock-pot in the kitchen. It should cook fine and not need anything else done to it."

I guess Daddy wanted me to hear him talking to Jessi and that is why she was in the hall but it did not matter. That crock-pot dinner was my ticket to drugging my family. As soon as they had left, I snuck out of my room with the medicine bottle in my hand.

Jessi was lounging in the living room with a pile of homework on the coffee table and she had headphones in her ears. She did not notice me peeking into the room behind her. I smiled and walked into the kitchen. The crock-pot was sitting on the counter. Quickly, I took the lid off and dumped the entire bottle of medicine in. I stuck the bottle in the trash and high tailed it back to my room before Jessi noticed me. Success!

I spent the rest of the day feeling rather antsy. I could not wait for my family to get back and eat the crock-pot meal. Drugging the food meant that I would be very hungry since I could not eat it myself but there were more important things in the world than my stomach.

Finally at around seven at night, I heard the car pull up in the driveway. It was my big house family arriving home from their picnic and hike. It was gigundoly unfair that they had not taken me but I guess it was too late now. Now it was time for revenge. Someone deposited a bowl of crock-pot stew outside my bedroom door for me. I took it and flushed it in my potty. I could not believe how smart I was to think of that. If my family did not hate me they would be very proud since I am a mega genius.

I read a book and waited until the house was quiet. I wanted to make doubly sure that everyone was asleep. It was eleven at night before I felt it was safe to sneak out of my room. I snickered quietly to myself as I stepped into the hallway.

I checked everyone's room for money. I did not leave a piggy bank, purse or wallet unchecked. I was going to be so rich and able to buy anything at Club G I wanted. I could not wait.

I checked Emily Michelle's room last of all. Yes, I robbed a two year old. I am proud of myself for doing it too. A baby does not need money as much as I do. Emily does not know or care about Club G. She looked pathetically cute sleeping there though but I still felt no remorse.

I tiptoed back to my room with my hands and pockets full of stolen money. I was going to count it and see how much I had. I stepped inside my room and turned the light switch on.

"Surprise Karen," a voice said as I turned the lights on. It was Daddy and he was standing inside my room. In fact my whole family was there except for Emily Michelle. Even Andrew was sitting in my laundry basket and he looked very angry. Nannie sat in my desk chair and did not look pleased. Kristy, Charlie and Sam sat on my bed which was not right since that is my throne. Elizabeth stood next to Daddy. David Michael was sitting on top of my desk. All of them looked like they wanted to kill me.

Daddy cleared his throat, "So Karen, you have turned to stealing from your own family. You also attempted to drug us. It is a good thing Jessi saw you doing it or maybe you would have succeeded in your plan. For punishment, I am extending your current isolation from the family for another month. Now, hand over the money."

I could not believe Jessi had seen me. That was gigundoly sneaky of her. I gave back Daddy the money and then they all left my room. No one else spoke to me but they were all giving my nasty looks.

I cried myself to sleep. I was feeling gigundoly lonely and now my mission to get myself Club G items was getting pretty desperate. Boo and Bullfrogs. I did not know what else I could do.


	12. Desperation

Chapter 12

Desperation

Since my plot to drug my family into sleepiness so I could rob them had failed along with all my other plans I was down to one final option. That option was to sneak out of my house, find a way to get to Stamford and Club G and then shoplift the things I wanted. I did not know how I was going to do it but I just had to succeed.

Since my punishment had been extended another month though, I had all the time in the world to figure out how to pull off the most gigundoly brave thing I had ever done. Due to my punishment, no one would even notice if I was gone. I decided to try it next weekend and use the week to plot. Maybe Hannie and Nancy could help me out at school.

On Monday morning, I decided to find out. At recess, I confronted Hannie and Nancy on the playground. "Girls, I have a mission I need to accomplish. Can you help me?"

Nancy sounded suspicious, "What kind of mission?"

"Well I was curious. When I grow up and am big like Kristy how would I get to the mall if I did have a car?" I did not want them to guess what I was really doing.

Hannie rolled her eyes, "Karen that is a really long time until you are old enough to do that. Why do you want to know now?"

Rats! Hannie and Nancy were not much help and I was worried they would tattle on me to my daddy. I saw a substitute playground monitor wandering around and ran up to him. I asked, "How can people get places if they do not own a car and it is too far to walk?"

I guess the playground monitor thought I was cute and innocent since he was a substitute and had not heard the lies about me around school because he gave me an answer. "Well little girl, a lot of people ride on the city bus to get where they need to go. The bus schedule has all the routes they need listed."

I thanked him and scampered off to join my friends. Now all I had to do was figure out how to get a bus schedule. There was a bus station near my school. We passed it everyday on the school bus and it was not far at all. I could remember exactly how to get there just from going by it.

A sneaky and gigundoly genius plan began to form in my head as I joined Hannie and Nancy for a game of tetherball. We had forty five minutes for recess after lunch every day. That would be more than enough time for me to sneak off the school property, run to the bus station, grab a bus schedule and sneak back to school without being noticed. Then I could plan the next phase of my wonderful plan to shoplift from Club G since I would know how to get there and back by bus. Oh and I would also know exactly what the bus fare would cost. I do not know much about riding the city bus but sometimes Kristy and her friends ride it. I have heard them talk about it before.

I could hardly wait to get to school the next morning. Then I realized that I had a problem. Hannie, Nancy and I played together every single day at recess. How was I going to sneak to the bus station without them getting suspicious? I knew that they would tattle me out to Ms. Coleman and my daddy. I would have to think of a way to trick Hannie and Nancy.

I thought very long and hard about it on the bus ride to school. Hannie kept trying to distract me with some whiny story about her baby sister Sari coloring on her homework with a color crayon. I felt very grumpy by this. Hannie should have seen how hard I was trying to think about my plans for getting to the bus station.

As the bus arrived in the school parking lot, it occurred to me what I could do. The school gym had an indoor recess area set up every day for kids who wanted to play board games, do homework or read books. My friends and I never went there unless there was rain but some kids went every day.

At lunch I put my plan in action, "Hannie and Nancy, I forgot to do my homework that is due this afternoon last night. I am going to go to the gym and do it at recess. I am sorry I can not join you outside."

Hannie shrugged, "Sorry to hear that Karen."

Nancy took a sip of milk then said, "We will miss you. Try and get your homework done fast so we can play for a little bit together."

Of course I had already done my homework the night before so I was just lying. As soon as no one was looking I snuck down the halls of the school building to the front door. I slipped outside and then began to make my way out to the main street. I was careful to hide behind bushes and trees so no one would catch me. I peeked behind me and when I was sure no one was looking, I dashed down the street, away from school and towards the bus station. I was gigundoly excited. I ran as fast as I could and hoped that no one would recognize me.

I was panting very hard and breathing heavily when I finally spotted the bus station. I smoothed my ponytail and looked at my reflection in the plate glass door. I hoped I looked grown up enough that no one would be suspicious. The bus station was not too crowded right then so maybe I could sneak in unnoticed.

I stepped inside the building. It was air conditioned and gigundoly cold. I shivered and looked around. I spotted the bus schedules sitting in a bin near the door. I walked quickly to the bin, snatched a bus schedule and then walked outside again. No one had really noticed me. There had been a group of little kids from a preschool going on a field trip sitting on a bench near the schedule bin. I hoped that the people running the bus station just thought I was a very big preschooler. I was just relieved it was not Andrew's preschool.

It did not matter what anyone inside had thought of me though. All that mattered was that I had a bus schedule and it was going to be my ticket to Club G. I skipped back to school with a smile on my face.

I managed to get back to school with fifteen minutes of recess left. No one at school had noticed my absence. I slid the bus schedule into backpack and then I went outside to spend the rest of recess with Hannie and Nancy. As soon as I got home it would be time to implement phase two of my wonderful plan. I was getting very excited and impatient.


	13. Sneaking Out

Chapter 13

Sneaking Out

That night I sat at home in my bedroom and poured over the bus schedule. It looked like I would have to walk three blocks from the big house to 92nd Street West and catch the Route 5 bus to downtown Stoneybrook. In downtown Stoneybrook, I would need to catch the Route 200 to the mall in Stamford. That sounded easy enough to do.

Of course I had yet another road block in my path to Club G. I could sneak out of the house without being noticed fairly easily but there was the problem of my stupid family leaving food for me to eat. I could say I had a tummy ache and did not want to eat but then they might get concerned and want to check on me. Or things could get even worse and my family would decide I needed some kind of yucky medicine to make my tummy better and come in my room. I would be in a gigundo amount of trouble if they discovered I was gone. I had hope though that my genius brain would think up a wonderful plan.

As it turned out I did not have to think of a plan. My family decided to go to the zoo without me on Saturday. I was beginning to think that they were planning fun outings without me deliberately to make me feel sad. Well I did not feel sad this time. It was the chance I was waiting for. I listened outside the door to Daddy talking to Kristy's friend Claudia who was obviously getting stuck with me for the day.

"Today, my plan is to put Karen up in the attic. There is air-conditioning and a bathroom up there so she will be fine. It will minimize any chance that she will wreak havoc on the rest of the house like she did last time we were gone. Nannie cleaned up one of the bedrooms up there and we will let Karen bring up her homework and some books or toys to entertain herself. I put a mini-fridge up there with food in it because I did not think it would be fair to make a babysitter climb all the stairs to feed Karen. It is just a safety hazard to have her roaming free when only you are here. I would lock her bedroom but then she would not be able to get to the bathroom. In the attic I can lock the attic door and she will be able to use the bathroom up there." Daddy opened the door as he said this.

"What's going on?" I did not want Daddy to know I had been eavesdropping on his conversation with Claudia. I waved at Claudia but she did not wave back. I guess we would not be playing Let's All Come In or using her kid-kit today. Oh well. I had plans of my own.

"Bring whatever you want from your room. I am locking you in the attic for the day. I have put food up there and there is toilet paper in the bathroom." Daddy looked impatient so I quickly grabbed my backpack. I had stuffed my purse inside it while I was eavesdropping.

"I have a lot of homework." I informed Daddy and Claudia cheerfully. I did not know how I was going to get down from the attic but I would figure out a way.

Daddy marched me up there and locked the door behind me. I opened the fridge and found a bowl of cut fruit and another of cottage cheese. It was labeled "breakfast". I ate it while thinking hard about what to do. I wished we had a hidden staircase like at Kristy's friend Dawn's house. I looked out the window. We did not have a hidden staircase but we did have a fire escape. Daddy had had it built since the house is so many stories tall and he did not want anyone to get hurt falling off a ladder if there was a fire. Daddy had locked all the attic windows. I guess he had thought about me escaping down the fire escape before I did. Boo and bullfrogs.

I was pretty sure I might be able to jimmy the lock open if I tried really hard. I do not have the best lock picking skills in the world but my stepbrother Sam had been teaching me before my punishment. When I asked him why he wanted to pick locks he rather cryptically told me that it was a skill he thought he might need someday. I do not know why but I did not ask him too many questions because he told me that I would never see Emily Junior again if I did. What a meanie mo!

I found a screwdriver and went to work on opening the window. It took me awhile but I was finally successful. I grabbed my backpack and slid out the window. I tiptoed down the fire escape and kept a close lookout for neighbors and Morbidda Destiny. I sure did not want caught. I got down the fire escape without anyone seeing me. Claudia, the junk-food eating lard was nowhere to be seen in any of the windows I peeked into. That meant she was probably in the kitchen stuffing her face with twinkies and ho-hos. I got out of the yard and ran stealthily down the street. I ducked behind cars and trees just in case anyone was looking out the window.

Finally I made it to the bus stop. The bus schedule said that kid's fare was exactly $1.00. I pulled the money out of my backpack. An old man using a cane arrived at the bus stop and smiled at me. Soon the bus arrived. The driver did not seem suspicious about me getting on the bus by myself. Maybe he thought I was with the old man who had been waiting with me. I handed him my money and accepted a transfer. I sat in the seat behind the old man just in case the driver did think we were together.

The bus ride to downtown Stoneybrook was uneventful. No one spoke to me. I was wearing what I hoped was a very grown up outfit. I had on a denim pleated skirt in dark navy blue paired with a light blue cotton sweater over a white blouse with a Peter Pan collar. I wore white knee socks and navy blue Mary Jane shoes. I had put my hair in a half pony tail held with a dark blue barrette.

The bus arrived at the transit center in downtown Stoneybrook. I looked at all the bus route signs until I found the one I needed. The bus was already there waiting so I just got on and showed my transfer. There were so many people going on that the bus driver on this bus probably just assumed I was with a grown up just like the driver on the last bus.

I sat down in a seat and smiled. I was on my way to Club G at last. This time no one had caught me sneaking out or anything else. I had finally succeeded. Well it was not quite success yet. I still had to get what I wanted from Club G and escape from the store without being caught but I was on my way. I took my lucky penny out of my backpack and squeezed it. I needed all the luck I could get. Still, I was sure my plan would work this time. It just had to.


	14. Stealthy Operations

_I apologize for the lack of updates. I went to upgrade the ram on my computer and for some reason or another it died. I don't have access to my files right now since I have been unable to fix the computer and am on a laptop so I can begin writing again. I had to rewrite a lot of the story since it was on my desktop computer. Again I apologize._

Chapter 14

Stealthy Operations

By the time the bus arrived at the mall, I had butterflies in my tummy. What if I could not do this? I thought that maybe I should just get back on the bus and then go home. Then I told myself to calm down. I could not just go home. I had a big important job to do. Stealing from Club G was going to be very hard work. I shouldered my backpack and set off across the parking lot to the mall entrance.

The mall was very crowded. The crowds were a gigundoly good thing. It meant it would be easy for me to blend it and not get noticed as easily. The last thing I wanted was to stand out so that if Club G reported the missing things to the police, someone would remember me as a suspect.

I made sure to smile big as I walked through the air-conditioned mall to Club G. Looking nervous would make me look suspicious. A happy, relaxed little girl would not make anyone think twice when they saw me.

I walked into Club G feeling determined. I gazed around the store with a smile. There is a saying that I have heard Nannie use before which says the world is your oyster. I guess it means that you can achieve anything in the world you want. I do not really know for sure

I had made a list of my plan of action for shoplifting. It was stuffed in my pocket. I took it out and unfolded it. The first thing it said was to stuff a bear into my backpack. I was not sure there was enough room in my backpack for a bear. I had not bothered to clean it out so maybe I could not steal a bear today. Boo and bullfrogs. I would come back to that later.

However, I did not come all this way for nothing. I headed to the clothing department. I took a Club G jean skirt and a baby blue Club G t-shirt from the rack. I grabbed a pair of Club G knee socks, Club G barrettes and a Club G tote bag from the accessory rack. I stuck the knee socks and barrettes into the tote bag and put the tote bag over my arm. Then I draped the clothes over my arm so that the tote bag was covered.

I headed over to the dressing rooms. The lady at the counter smiled at me. "Just go on in and whatever doesn't fit, hang it up inside the dressing room on the hook."

I smiled back and walked into the dressing rooms. I chose a stall that was the farthest away from the counter out of all the stalls. There were already clothes hanging up on the hooks in the stall. My plan was going off perfectly so far. Since so much was already up on the hooks, no one would notice that I had not hung anything up.

I closed the stall door and then I saw something under the bench in the stall. Something that made me gasp with surprise. I bent over and pulled a Club G bear off the floor. It was an already bought and paid for bear and it looked like someone had brought it to visit Club G and had left it in here. The bear was not the bear I had wanted. It had red hair and dark brown fur with black eyes but still it was a Club G bear. I knew that the honest thing to do would be to turn it into the customer service but I was not there on an honest mission. I was there to steal and stealing is very dishonest. I was not really feeling guilty about it though so I stuffed the bear into my backpack.

I smiled to myself as I quietly took the tags off the clothes I wanted and stuck the tags into pockets of clothes hanging on the racks. Then I took off my own clothes and put on the clothes I was stealing. I put my own clothes back on over the new clothes. The clothes felt gigundoly hot and tight but at least the new clothes were not visible.

I looked in the mirror. I turned around and around. I looked very fat with my clothes on top of the new ones. I frowned. I did not care though. I had a new Club G outfit and my very own Club G bear. My shoplifting trip was almost a success. Now I just had to get out of the store.

I put the tote bag into my backpack with the bear and did one final check of the dressing room to make sure nothing was out of place or looked suspicious. Then I put on my backpack and walked out of the dressing room stall.

The lady at the counter smiled again at me, "How did those work out for you sweetie?"

"Oh the clothes were not what I had in mind really. I put them on the hooks inside the dressing room. I am going to go out and browse to see if I can find an outfit I like better." I smiled and waved at the counter lady and then hurried off before she got suspicious.

"Let me know if I can assist you," she called after me as I walked off.

Now it was time for me to make my escape to the front of the store and then back to the bus stop. I had to get home before the junky aka Claudia Kishi noticed my absence. Or worse yet my family arrived home. I wanted more things from Club G but I had to high tail it out of there to ensure my success.

I made my way casually towards the front entrance of the store, humming the Club G commercial theme song softly to myself as I went. I picked up my pace to a brisk walk but not fast enough to be running. Running would be suspicious and my parents and teacher always tell me that running inside is dangerous.

I approached the front of the store. I saw the security sensors at the front entrance and my heart stopped. Then I remembered that I had removed the tags from my clothes and continued walking. I walked out of the store and into the main corridor of the mall. I breathed a sigh of relief when I did not set off the alarms. I was going to make it after all. I looked back into Club G to see if anyone had noticed me but no one was looking my way. I had just successfully shoplifted from Club G. It was the most brilliant moment of my life.

I walked happily towards the entrance of the mall that was nearest to the bus stop. I was on top of the world and nothing was ever going to bring me down. All I had to do now was make it safely home without anyone noticing my return. That would be easy enough though.


	15. Success

Chapter 15

Success

I was very hot and stuff in my doubled up clothes by the time I reached the mall transit center. I was also tired, hungry and thirsty. I did not want to waste my time or my money on food or drinks. I needed to get home as soon as possible and I knew that the attic mini fridge was stacked with food. Well unless Claudia "pork-a-lot" Kishi had snuck up and stole it all. I do not know why she would need to when the kitchen and pantry were stuffed with food and I am sure Daddy and Elizabeth told her to help herself. They are too generous with babysitters if you ask me. Claudia would eat them out of house and home if given the chance.

When the bus arrived, I climbed on, handed the driver my money, and took a transfer. Then I walked to a seat near the back of the bus and slumped into it. I did not realize that stealing would be such exhausting work. I was very sleepy and wished I could take a nap on the bus but I could not sleep and risk not getting home on time. I could not have Daddy or Elizabeth know what I had been up to today.

I watched groggily out the window as the bus rolled through town. I was hot and tired and I had to admit I was a little bit nervous still. What if my family saw my Club G items and got suspicious? I knew Hannie and Nancy would just be jelly but if Daddy saw my new things, he would know that he had not bought them for me. He would probably call Mommy and when he found out Mommy had not bought me anything he would be very suspicious. Daddy would know I did not have enough money to buy those things myself. I would just have to keep a gigundoly big secret from my whole family. It would be worth it though.

I got off the bus at the downtown transit center. The bus back to my neighborhood was not there yet. I sat on a bench next to a man listening to his ipod. He had cranked it up very loudly and I could hear the song he was listening to through his headphones. My mouth opened wide in surprise as I realized that it could be my theme song.

_Shoplifters of the world  
Unite and take over  
Shoplifters of the world   
Hand it over  
Hand it over  
Hand it over_

I nudged the man with my elbow, "Excuse me sir? What is that song you are listening to?"

He looked at me as if I was insane but answered me, "It is by The Smiths. It is called Shoplifters of the World Unite."

I had never heard of The Smiths. I figured it was an old people's band. Maybe it was like the lame music Daddy likes. It was still my new theme song. I decided I would do the sweater pants dance to it when I got home. Yes, I would definitely have to do the sweater pants dance to celebrate my success. Never mind that I did not have a copy of that song. I would find one. Sam could get it for me off the internet except he was not speaking to me because of my punishment. Maybe Daddy or Elizabeth had a copy of that song on a CD somewhere in the house or maybe I could sneak on to the internet when no one was looking. I wish they would get me a computer to have in my own room.

My bus arrived while I was thinking about it so I got on the bus and showed the driver my transfer. While the bus headed towards my neighborhood, I peeked into my backpack at my new bear.

"I'll have to think of a gigundoly good name for you." I whispered to the bear.

I did not really have any ideas for the bear's name. She was not the bear I had wanted so she could not be Karen the Bear. She looked nothing at all like me. I would really have to think of a good name for her.

I was still thinking about a bear name when the bus finally arrived at my stop and I ran as fast as I could up the street to my house. I was starting to get worried that I would not make it inside on time and that my family and Lardia Fatshi would realize I had been gone.

I sighed with relief as I arrived in my driveway and saw that no cars were home. I slipped around the side of the house into the backyard and started to tiptoe up the fire escape. I passed the living room window on the way up and saw Blobbia passed out on the couch with a bag of nacho cheese Doritos lying open on her stomach. There were also a few Coke cans and a partially eaten package of cookies sitting on the coffee table in front of her. I knew she would have the mess cleaned up before my family caught her. Claudia was very good about keeping up impressions when she babysat me. Still, I rolled my eyes at her bloated stomach. No one else was honest enough to admit that Claudia had gotten chunky lately except for me. I loved laughing at her and making up names for her in my head like Chubbia and Chunkia.

I made it up to the attic and stripped off my clothes. It felt good not to be in extra clothing. I did a modified version of the sweater pants dance without the sweater or the radio playing. Instead, it was just me in my underwear singing the chorus to Shoplifters of the World Unite repeatedly. I finally stuffed my Club G outfit in my backpack and put on my normal clothes.

I was getting hungry so I checked out the mini fridge for some lunch. There was a plate with a tuna fish sandwich, fruit salad and dill pickles on it plus a glass of milk. I took them out and ate. It was my celebration lunch.

After I ate, I took out the bear and went to a corner behind a table to sit so that no one could tell what I was doing if they came up. I brought my backpack under the table too. I hugged my bear and looked at her with a smile. I could not believe she was all mine. I began thinking of names again. Sierra? Kayla? Tara? Belle? Sophia?

I was startled out of my thoughts by the attic door opening. It was Daddy. Quickly I stuffed the bear back into my pack. "Hi Daddy!"

Daddy was not too happy to see me. I was annoyed. He needed to get over his grudge against me. "Come along, Karen. You can go back to your bedroom now."

As soon as I got to my room, I flipped on the radio. I turned it to a classic rock station at random. Much to my surprise, it was my theme song. Quickly, I changed into my sweater pants. Then I did a victory dance.

Maybe Hannie and Nancy would help me name my bear. After all, I did not have to keep it a secret from them that I had the Club G items. I just had to lie to them that my family had caved and bought it for me. I could not wait for school on Monday!


	16. Not Impressed

Chapter 16

Not Impressed

On Monday morning, I dressed in my new Club G outfit. I stuffed my bear into my backpack again. I still had not named the bear but I was sure my friends would be able to help me with a great name for her.

My breakfast, a bowl of cheerios was waiting for me as usual outside my door. I ate then put a long coat on over my outfit so my family did not spot my Club G outfit. Fortunately, David Michael does not go to my school so I did not have to wait at the bus with him.

Hannie was already at the bus stop when I got there. I waved at her but she did not wave back. Maybe she just did not see me. I ran up to her with a big smile on my face.

Hannie glared at me, "Oh hello, Karen Brewer."

I did not like her tone of voice, "What's wrong, Hannie?"

Hannie snorted, "You would not understand."

"You are right, Hannie. I do not understand. You are supposed to be one of my best friends. I did not do anything to you to deserve this." I hoped I was not whining but Hannie was really being a huge meanie mo for no good reason at all. I know she is jelly of how great I am but that is no reason to act like Morbidda Destiny's apprentice.

The bus arrived and we got on it. I sat in my usual seat next to Hannie. She was still angry. I turned to her and tried again. "Hannie, can you please tell me what is wrong?"  
Hannie was silent for a moment then she turned to me and snapped, "Karen, you will get angry if I tell you. So stop asking me. Nancy and I planned to tell you at school together."

I was seething with anger. No one has any right to shun the one and only Karen Brewer or to keep secrets from me. "Hannie! You must tell me. I will die if I do not know."

"Stuff it, Karen." Hannie was very angry. I could tell because telling anyone to stuff it or shut up is not something she would normally do.

We sat for the rest of the bus ride in silence. When we arrived at school, Hannie stomped off the bus ahead of me. I followed her inside to our classroom. Nancy was already there sitting with Natalie Springer also known as Princess Dorky. I could not believe Nancy was hanging out with her but they seemed to be having a good time.

Nancy waved, "Hi Hannie!"

"What about me?" I whined. I was not happy.

Natalie smile but did not say anything. I did not trust her smile though. It looked secretive and smug. I reached out and slapped her. Natalie started to cry. She is such a baby.

Nancy and Hannie looked angrier than ever with me. They looked at each other and finally Nancy said, "Karen, there is something we need to tell you."

"Yea, it's pretty important," Hannie mumbled with her fingers in her mouth. She is a nail biter. I think that is gigundoly yucky. She once made a new year's resolution to stop doing it but I kept catching her. That is because Hannie is a loser who cannot keep her promises.

"What is it?" I really hate to be in suspense.

Nancy took a deep breath, "Well the truth is Karen, and we do not want to be friends with you anymore. You are mean and bossy. You are a selfish, spoiled liar. You make so much trouble that your parents ground you all the time so we can never play with you at all. We are tired of it. We are kicking you out of the three musketeers and replacing you with Natalie."

"Sorry Karen," Hannie just would not stop biting her nails. Natalie still was quiet.

I decided it was time for action. I pulled open my coat and took it off. I pointed to my gigundoly wonderful Club G outfit. "Well, I went to Club G this weekend and my daddy bought me a lot of wonderful Club G things. This was to make up for how mean he has been to me lately."

"We do not care, Karen. All that shows us is that your daddy made you into a spoiled brat." Hannie rolled her eyes.

Hannie sure had some nerve calling me a spoiled brat. "Well I got a Club G bear and I named it after my three best friends."

Natalie finally spoke up, "You have never been very friendly to me, Karen."

I ignored her and pulled the bear out of my backpack. I had come up with a name fast in my head. It was a very stupid name but it would have to do. "This is Hannalie. The "han" stands for Hannie. The "na" stands for Nancy. The "lie" stands for Natalie. I love you all so very much and I think there is room for four of us. We can just be The Four Musketeers instead of three. It will be gigundoly great."

Nancy rolled her eyes, "You sound desperate, Bossy Brewer. We do not want to be friends with you."

I started to cry but Hannie interrupted my tears, "Be quiet, Karen. You ruined our day at Club G. You do not know how long Nancy and I cried when we got home. If you were our real friend, you would not have acted like that. I thought it served you right that you got nothing at Club G but now I see you have gotten more Club G things than any of the rest of us have. I for one am sick and tired of being friends with a monster who always gets her own way and never learns her lesson."

"Are you done whining now?" I grumbled at Hannie.

"Yes I think I have said all I need to say to you. I just want you to know that we are not impressed with your bossy, braggart ways." Hannie said angrily.

"Well I haven't said all I need to say to you!" That is when I pounced on Hannie and started to beat her down. I had never been so angry in all my life. How dare my friends turn on me like that? When Natalie and Nancy joined in to try to protect Hannie, I tore into them too. It was three against one but I was still winning.

The fight continued until Ms. Colman came into the room and pried me off the other girls. She took me to the principal's office. On the way, I tried to tell her my side of the story.

Ms. Colman gave me a funny look. "I think I will recommend that your parents be called and you go home for the day."

I started to cry but I did not care anymore. I was starting to wonder if my love for Club G was worth the constant groundings and losing my family and friends for. Now even my favorite teacher ever seemed tired of me.

Ms. Colman left me in the waiting room outside the office. She came out a few minutes later and informed me that they called my parents and someone would pick me up shortly. Then she left me there by myself. I started to cry harder as I sat and waited for my ride home. I did not know what I was going to do now.


	17. Suspicious Minds

Chapter 17

Suspicious Minds

Nannie and Emily Michelle were the ones who ended up picking me up from school. Nannie did not look too thrilled to be there but stupid Emily was excited to see me. While I had been waiting, Bobby Gianelli had brought my things from the classroom to me so I was all ready to go.

"Kaywen!" Emily Michelle shrieked. She ran to me with her arms outstretched. My goodness, she is such an undisciplined little brat!

I was about to pick her up for a hug anyway when Nannie snatched her up. "No, Emily. No! No! Karen is in big trouble."

"Tubble?" Emily looked sad.

"Come on, Karen. I do not have all day to waste waiting for you." Nannie snapped.

I grabbed my things and followed Nannie and Emily Michelle outside to Nannie's piece of junk car, which she calls the Pink Clinker. It smells like old people but a ride is a ride.

Nannie took a quick look at me as I buckled up my seatbelt. "Karen, I do not recognize your outfit. It has the logo from the Club G place you are obsessed with all over it. How did you get anything from Club G?"

I shifted nervously in my seat and did my best to avoid Nannie's nosiness. She sure is an old busy body, "Nannie, step on the gas please. I really need to go potty."

Emily smiled. Probably because she is learning to use the potty, "Potty! Yay! Me too?"

I rolled my eyes at Emily but at least she was a distraction from Nannie questioning me. Nannie seemed to temporarily forget about me as she paid attention to Emily. I felt annoyed while Nannie told Emily what a big girl she is. Who cares if Emily Michelle went to the bathroom? I shoplifted from a store. I think that makes me a much more sophisticated 'big girl' than Emily.

We got home and I rushed off to my bedroom before Nannie could ask me any more questions about my Club G outfit. I quickly changed into other clothes and shoved the Club G outfit into my closet.

I took Hannalie out of my backpack and curled up on my bed. All of a sudden, I felt really sad and tired. My friends hated me, my family hated me and now Nannie had spotted my Club G clothes. If Daddy and Mommy found out what I had done, I would be in a gigundo heap of trouble. I stuck my thumb in my mouth like a baby and went to sleep with Hannalie cuddled in the crook of my other arm.

I must have slept for a very long time because the next thing I saw when I opened my eyes was Kristy standing beside my bed. She was frowning as she looked at me.

"Karen, Nannie said something about you wearing what looked like a Club G outfit. I do not see that on your body right now but I do not think Nannie would lie about something that serious." Kristy looked around the room with a suspicious glint in her eye.

I squinted and grabbed my glasses. They had fallen off while I was sleeping. "Kristy, you know I do not have any clothes from Club G. Nannie's eyesight is starting to go bad and she is old so maybe she is going insane."

Kristy glared at me, "You never insult my Nannie like that. Maybe Nannie did see you in Club G clothes and you are just a malicious, evil liar."

"I am not a liar. Nannie is!" I yelled at Kristy. I could not have her find out the truth about what I had done.

Kristy went to the doorway of my room, "We will just see about that. Sam! Charlie!"

My stepbrothers came running into my room. Charlie looked from Kristy to me with interest. "Yes Kristy?"

Kristy is used to being big meanie mo bossy pants as the president of the Babysitter's Club. "Hold Karen down, boys. I am going to search her room for the Club G clothing she was wearing earlier when Nannie picked her up from school."

Charlie and Sam each grabbed one of my arms and held me firmly between them. I looked frantically about for Hannalie and realized with relief that the bear had to have fallen underneath my bed while sleeping. I began to kick and scream while Kristy tore my room apart.

"No! You keep your hands off my stuff, Kristin Amanda Thomas! You big ugly meanie mo!" I practically roared at Kristy in the biggest outdoor voice I could possible manage.

It was no use. Kristy smiled with triumph as she pulled my Club G outfit out of the closet. "Aha! What do we have here?"

"None of your beeswax!" I grumbled at her.

"Let's go, boys. We will let Watson deal with her." Kristy said.

Charlie and Sam let me go and the three of them marched out without another word to me. I fell backwards on my bed and resumed throwing a tantrum.

Soon Daddy came into my room, "Come down to the den, Karen. We are having a family meeting to discuss what Kristy found in your room. If you have anything else from Club G, bring it with you."

The look on Daddy's face told me I had better not deceive him any further. I scrambled to find the tote bag and Hannalie. Daddy saw the bear and bag. He looked even angrier if that was possible but he said nothing else.

I clutched on to Hannalie and followed Daddy down to the den. My tummy felt sick. I was very scared. I had done so well at getting to Club G and getting the items that I had thought nothing could stop me. Now it seemed like everything was coming apart at once. I cried silently so Daddy would not hear me. Why did bad things always have to happen to good people like me? Meanie mos like Kristy or Hannie never have people mad at them or get in trouble but I always do.

Daddy and I entered the den. My entire big house family was there from Nannie all the way down to Emily Michelle. There was an empty chair sitting in the middle of the room. On the chair was taped a sign which said 'Karen'.

"Sit down, Karen." Daddy pointed to the chair.

I did not need to be told twice. I sat down and got ready to face the music.


	18. Family Meeting

Chapter 18

Family Meeting

I

"Hello all and welcome to today's edition of _The Brewer/Thomas Family Meeting! _Today's topic is "Karen and The Mysterious Club G Outfit!" Sam said in a gigundoly stupid impersonation of a talk show host.

Kristy and Charlie giggled at Sam's joke but Elizabeth snapped, "Sam, this is no joking matter."

Daddy clapped his hands loudly to get everyone's attention, "As you all know, Karen has somehow managed to obtain a Club G outfit despite being on punishment since the opening day of Club G when her mother said she did not buy Karen anything due to her atrocious behavior. Karen's mistreatment of the entire family during the past month and her fighting at school are also a problem."

I could feel everyone looking at me even though I kept staring at the floor. I felt like all of their eyes were burning through me and could see the truth about what I had done just by looking at me.

"Karen," Elizabeth said gently, "We need to know where you got the Club G items. We just want the truth."

I had to make up a lie fast so I blurted out the first thing that popped into my head, "Hannie and Nancy gave them to me. They felt gigundoly awful about me not getting anything at Club G so they pooled their money to buy me the outfit, bag and bear."

Daddy did not look like he believed me but he said, "I will go call Hannie and Nancy immediately. Everyone stay here."

Things were quiet in the room until Daddy came back in. He nodded at everyone then said, "Hannie is on her way over. Nancy cannot come but her mother said to call back when Hannie gets here. I am going to put Nancy on speaker phone."

A few minutes later, Hannie arrived since she is my neighbor and is not far away. Daddy went and got her and led her into the den. Charlie found a folding chair and set it up by the phone for Hannie to sit in.

Daddy dialed Nancy and a few minutes later he said, "I have Nancy on the line so we can begin. I will turn on the speaker. Alright Hannie?"

Hannie nodded, "Yes, Mr. Brewer."

Daddy cleared his throat, "Ok, Nancy can you hear me?"

Nancy's voice came crackling through the speaker, "Yes, I can hear you."

Daddy smiled, "Alright, Hannie and Nancy, I have a few questions for you. Did the two of you buy Karen anything at Club G the day you went to the store?"

"No sir," Hannie replied.

"No way," Nancy echoed.

Daddy continued, "Did your mothers buy Karen anything at Club G?"

Hannie shook her head, "My mommy did not buy Karen a thing."

"My mommy did not buy her anything either." Nancy added.

"Have you or anyone else from your families bought Karen anything from Club G or the catalog at any point in time?" Daddy asked.

"I have never ever bought Karen anything from Club G. She told us you bought her those things." Hannie sounded confused.

"Yes she said you bought it, Mr. Brewer because you felt sad for being mean to her," Nancy the snitch told him.

"Well girls, Karen told you a lie." Daddy informed them before turning to me, "Karen, where did you get those Club G things?"

I thought up another lie but I was starting to get very scared, "Mommy bought those things for me."

Daddy did not look like he believed me, "Nancy, I am going to hang up and call Karen's mommy. Thank you very much for your time."

Hannie did not move and Daddy did not say anything to her. Instead, he dialed the phone, "Hi Lisa? It is Watson."

I heard Mommy's voice over the speaker then, "Hi Watson. Is there anything wrong with Andrew?"

I was annoyed she did not ask if there was anything wrong with me but Daddy did not seem to care, "Andrew is fine."

Andrew piped in, "Hi Mommy!"

"Hi Andy-Pandy," Mommy said to him.

Andrew giggled happily that Mommy had heard him. What a baby brat!

Daddy went on, "It is Karen. She is in a lot of trouble. She has somehow managed to get a Club G outfit, bag and bear. We do not know how she managed to obtain these things since she keeps changing her story of how she did and covering her tracks with lies. She told Hannie and Nancy that I bought the things for her. Then she told me that Hannie and Nancy bought the things for her. Now we have determined that both of those explanations were lies. Karen's latest claim is that you bought the Club G items for her."  
Mommy was quiet for a moment then replied, "But I have not purchased Karen any Club G items. Neither has Seth. As far as I know, Karen does not even own any Club G items. Watson, if she has anything from Club G, I really do not know how she could have gotten them."

Daddy sighed, "Do not worry, Lisa. I believe you. I will find out how Karen did this."

"Alright, I need to go now. Seth and I have plans. Call me when you find out what Karen did so we can think of a suitable punishment." Mommy responded before hanging up the phone.

Daddy refocused his anger on me, "Karen, it seems you are still lying about how you obtained those Club G items."

"Well Daddy, how do you know that maybe everyone else is lying to you because you are crazy and mean and they are afraid of you?" I was feeling gigundoly bold and brave.

"GO TO YOUR ROOM KAREN BREWER! JUST GO BEFORE I GET ANGRY. YOU WILL STAY THERE UNTIL YOU ARE READY TO CONFESS. AND I MEAN CONFESS THE TRUTH. NO MORE LIES AND STORIES." Daddy had officially gone insane if his screaming and bellowing was any indication.

I began to cry and ran upstairs to my bedroom without another word. This was turning out to be the most gigundoly unfair day of my life.


	19. Tell The Truth, Karen!

Chapter 19

Tell The Truth, Karen!

I sat in my room and cried while clutching onto my big house half of Tickly. I thought again, about how I had no friends left and my entire family hated me. I felt gigundoly horrible. I did not know what I was going to do now. I could never face my family again. I would end up in jail for sure. I cried harder and wiped my eyes on the corner of Tickly.

All of a sudden, the ceiling of my room opened up just like the sunroof on a car opens up. I could see bright blue skies and clouds above me. I had thought the sun was setting when I had come up here but maybe I was wrong. I felt a little nervous so I squeezed Tickly a little bit tighter. I also did not know how there could be sky through the ceiling of my room if it was missing since I do not live in the attic but I was not going to question what I was seeing right before my very eyes.

I heard a strange whooshing sound like a helicopter coming from outside. I quickly got up and hurried to the window. Andrew and I just love to see helicopters and airplanes fly by the house. We like to imagine where we would go if we were on them.

I peered out the window and was very disappointed. I did not see anything outside but the whooshing sounds continued to come from somewhere outside. I did not see anything though and there was not much of a breeze so it was not the wind.

Then I heard a strange sound. It sounded like a laugh. In fact, it sounded just like an evil witch laugh. "Morbidda Destiny?" I whispered to Emily Junior and Tickly. Neither responded to me.

"Hehehe! Yes Karen! It is I, Morbidda Destiny!" The cackle came again and this time Morbidda came with it. She swooped through the hole in the ceiling on her broomstick. She was wearing hideous witch clothing and a pointy hat.

"DADDY! DADDY!" I wailed at the sight of her.

Morbidda Destiny laughed at me, "Oh I do not think that will do you any good, missy."

I noticed then that the whooshing noises were still happening from somewhere outside my room. They had not stopped even though Morbidda was standing still in the middle of my room. Just as I realized that the funny noises were not coming from Morbidda, I saw something else coming through my ceiling.

The newcomer was a strange creature. It had an unnatural orangish skin color, which reminded me of a brand new penny. It had hair that was slightly darker and feathered wings, which were slightly lighter in shade. It was wearing a yellow loincloth around its private parts. The creature's wings were what were making the whooshing noises. I noticed that it had a human face and then with horror I realized it was my daddy!

I screamed, "Elizabeth! Kristy! Nannie! Sam! Charlie! David Michael! Emily Michelle! Andrew! Daddy turned into a monster!"

"So have we." Elizabeth's voice came from above me and in she flew followed by the rest of my big house family.

"We are also monsters." Another voice said. It was my Mommy. She flew in followed by Seth. Right behind them came Hannie and Nancy. All of them were monsters. It was the most gigundoly horrible thing in the world to see. The boy monsters were all wearing loincloths of yellow leather and the girls were wearing short dresses of the same material. They had no shoes or socks on.

Morbidda cackled maniacally as all of the monsters began to chant, "Tell the truth! Tell the truth! Tell the truth!"

I grabbed a baton out of my closet and waved it like a sword at the monsters, "It's not your business where I got any of this. You are all just freaks! Get out of my room and leave me alone!"

Monster-Andrew hissed in my face and Monster-Emily spit at me. I cried and covered my face with my hands but this only angered the monsters more and I was slapped by Monster-Hannie.

"Tell us Karen! Tell us!" The monsters wailed in unison.

I shrieked, "No! No! I will never ever tell anyone. I do not have to tell you. I deserve my Club G items more than anyone else in the world. I waited forever to have them and I got them so they are mine. MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE!"

Monster-David Michael snickered, "Oh no Karen! You see, now all of this is ours. Let us go guys!"

Then right before my very eyes the monsters began spewing fire from their mouths at everything in my room. Morbidda pulled a magic wand from her pocket and waved it. Mini tornadoes came out of the tip of the want and began destroying everything in sight.

I screamed at the sight of my room being destroyed by Morbidda and my monster family. I kept screaming as loud as I could. Then I felt someone shaking my shoulder and my eyes flew open.

"Karen? Karen? Are you alright?" Kristy was shaking my shoulder. She was no longer a monster. I looked up at my ceiling and it was no longer missing. "Um what happened?" I demanded. I was not sure I could trust Kristy since she had just come in here as a monster.

Kristy looked worried, "Karen, you were screaming at the top of your lungs in your sleep. I think you must have been having a bad dream."

A nightmare? Was that all it was? I was very relieved that the monsters were not real. I hugged Kristy tightly.

"Are you alright?" Kristy asked me again.

I took a deep breath, "I will be alright once I confess the truth to everyone."

Kristy looked skeptical, "Really Karen? I hope it is the truth this time. We are all tired of your lies."

"Yes, Kristy. I swear it is the truth. I cannot bear the guilt anymore. I am scared that you will all turn into monsters just like in my dream." I was still very scared that the dream might come true.

"Alright, Karen. We will go downstairs and you will tell everyone what you told me about it being the truth this time." Kristy led my out of my room.

Daddy was not happy to see me again. I do not think he trusted me yet but he called in the rest of the family. Hannie had gone home for supper.

Daddy pointed to the chair I had sat in before, "Sit Karen."

I sat and immediately began talking without an introduction or any small talk. I needed to get the guilt off my chest as soon as possible, "I stole everything. When Claudia was babysitting me, I snuck out of the house using the fire escape. Then I caught the bus to the mall. I went to Club G and I put the stolen clothes on under my own clothes in the dressing room. I stuffed the other stuff in my backpack. Then I came home before you all did without being caught. I am sorry. Please do not hate me."

No one said anything for a while but then Daddy spoke up, "No I do not hate you Karen but it will be a long time before I trust you again and am not angry at you. Get your coat and shoes on. Grab everything from Club G. You and I are making a special trip to the mall so you can try and make things right."

Return to Club G? My tummy felt very sick but I knew Daddy was right. I ran off to do what he said and soon we were in the car on our way.


	20. No More Club G

Chapter 20

No More Club G

Daddy and I drove in silence to the Washington Mall. I held Hannalie tightly in my arms. I would probably never see her again. The rest of my Club G things I stuffed into the Club G tote bag, which I had stowed away under my seat.

"Daddy?" I wanted to ask him if he was still mad at me.

Daddy gave me an angry look then he turned on the radio full blast but he kept ignoring me. I knew he had turned on the radio specifically so that he would not hear me. I put my face against the window and stared outside for the rest of the way to the mall.

At the mall, Daddy took the Club G items from me before we got out of the car. He slammed the car door shut and motioned to me to follow.

"But Daddy, I want to say goodbye to Hannalie and my other things from Club G." I whined as I stumbled out of the car and closed the passenger door.

Daddy ignored me and kept walking towards the mall entrance so I scurried after him. We went inside the mall and arrived at Club G too fast for my liking. Daddy practically ran there if you ask me.

Daddy marched up to the nearest Club G employee and demanded to see someone in charge. The woman escorted us up to the top floor of the store where the offices were.

"You are very lucky. Ms. Covington is working late tonight. Ordinarily she would be gone much earlier. We only have an hour before the store closes so I hope you get this taken care of quick. You do understand that if you were not Watson Brewer we could not make such an exception for you." The woman simpered at Daddy.

Daddy gave her a smile, "Well you know what they say: money talks."

I noticed that the woman was holding a one hundred dollar bill that had not been in her hand before. Daddy must have given it to her in order to swindle us an appointment with whoever was in charge.

The woman knocked on a door, "Ms. Covington?"

A voice answered from the other side of the door, "Send them in, Jenna."

Jenna shrugged and motioned to the door then she scurried off. Daddy opened it and we went inside. A woman about the same age as my mommy sat at a desk. She wore dark black striped slacks and a white blouse with a blue sweater vest over it. She had sleek black hair done in an elegant crown braid. I would have to remember this hairdo next time I played Lovely Ladies.

The woman smiled, "Hello. Jenna called to tell me she was bringing you up. You must be Mr. Brewer and Karen. What can I do for you?"

Daddy gave me a Look. I reached for the bag of Club G things that he had brought with him. I stuck the bag on the desk and began unpacking it. I did not say anything.

Ms. Covington looked confused but continued to smile, "Karen? Why are you giving me your Club G things?"

I sighed and mumbled, "They are not mine. I stole them from the store."

Ms. Covington's smile slowly faded from her face, "Karen, explain this. You stole these from Club G?"

I took a deep breath and the story began to tumble out. Ms. Covington began to look angry. Not as angry as Daddy looked but she did not look happy with me at all.

When I was done, Ms. Covington glared at Daddy and said, "You will need to pay for the items that Karen took. We cannot resell them now that Karen used the items. The bear we will check with customer service to see if anyone has reported it missing."

"So I get to keep the items since my daddy is paying? What about the bear? If nobody claims it can I have it?" It looked like everything might come up Karen after all.

Ms. Covington's jaw looked like it might drop to the floor, "You have some nerve little girl. Mr. Brewer, it is attitudes like your daughter's which lead to a life of crime and dishonesty. I feel a better step would be to donate the items to a less fortunate child."

Daddy nodded, "Definitely, I will pay for the items including a donation to buy additional Club G items for a needy child. Someone should benefit from Karen's crime and it should not be Karen."

"I also would like to impose a lifetime ban on Karen from Club G stores and merchandise catalogs. Karen's behavior does not embody the spirit of Club G."

"I agree completely, Ms. Covington." Daddy took my arm but I jerked it away.

"WHAT ABOUT ME? I AM A NEEDY CHILD. I NEED CLUB G. I WANT IT! I NEED IT." I howled, kicked, and screamed at Daddy and Ms. Covington.

Daddy ignored my tantrum and wrote a check for Ms. Covington then he hauled me kicking and screaming back to the car. I screamed the entire way home but it did not change anything. Daddy refused to give into me.

My entire big house family rushed out when we got home because they heard my shrieks. I was getting hoarse but I kept on crying. Daddy carried me up to my bedroom and slammed the door shut on me. I cried myself to sleep.

The next morning I slept very late even though it was a school day. I guess they were all scared to wake me up. When I finally did wake up, I was exhausted. I was also hungry.

I went down to the kitchen to get a snack. It must have been lunchtime since Nannie and Emily were eating. Emily waved at me.

"Feeling better Karen now that the whole mess is over? Honesty really is the best policy. Your daddy already called the school and told them you were not feeling well. I will get you some lunch." Nanny got up and got a plate of macaroni salad and grapes out of the fridge.

I ate and then wandered back to my bedroom. I was still very tired but I could not fall back asleep. No more Club G. Ever. I felt like my life was over and it was all Daddy and Ms. Covington's fault. I found a blank notebook lying in a heap of things on my desk. I had an idea. I got out a pen, labeled the cover "Karen's Diary", and opened it up to write.

_Dear Diary,_

_I am banned forever from Club G. My daddy is a selfish greedy monster who bribes sales clerks and neglects his own daughter. Life is gigundoly unfair. Hannie and Nancy-_

I stopped there because just then Hannie and Nancy walked through my door. I was gigundoly surprised to see them.

"Hi Karen." Nancy sounded a bit timid.

"Oh hello, Nancy." I wondered why they were here.

Hannie answered my question before I could ask it, "Karen, you did some pretty horrible things but your daddy said you returned e I everything to Club G and told the truth. I think if maybe you apologize to us we can be friends again."

I did not think I needed to apologize but I did it anyway, "I am sorry for what I did. Group hug?"

We hugged. Three Musketeers Forever! I could not go to Club G ever again but at least I had my friends back. Things would be ok after all.

The End.


End file.
